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dresden_kink_mods ([personal profile] dresden_kink_mods) wrote in [community profile] dresden_kink2011-03-21 09:37 pm
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tir_synni: Harry Dresden (Dresden)

[personal profile] tir_synni 2011-05-28 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
Not anon'ing as I just posted this on my lj. *coughs*

Does anyone else think that maybe Harry's perspective on gender roles/his chivalry/chauvinism is just an extension of his fear of sexuality? I mean, he is comfortable associating sex with a woman only as long as he can also associate love, commitment, etc. He grows more relaxed come the time with Luccio, but even then he expected long-term commitment and needed Luccio in his face and Thomas shoving him into her.

When it comes to looking at men and women, he looks at them both in a sexual way without admitting he's looking at them in a sexual way (i.e., Molly, Marcone, and Thomas before he knew Thomas was his brother). He makes it clear that he thinks of Molly as a relative while checking out her chest. It's possible he's the only person who's mastered being in the closet for bisexuality.

The only time he has control over someone else's sexuality, he bans sexual acts. It makes you wonder if that was something that was taught to him (apprentices /=/ sex) or if it's something he wished he could have done himself when he was younger (been celibate and stayed celibate).

tl;dr: Harry Dresden's a chauvinistic bastard because he's scared of sex.

(Anonymous) 2011-05-28 04:14 am (UTC)(link)
alternately - he's scared of sex for different, undisclosed reasons. Perhaps something to do with Elaine and Justin, or just something from that time period in his life (or his time with Eb). Being a young, impressionable teenager, it's quite possible that he still has things that Justin taught him that are so deeply ingrained that he doesn't even associate them with that period in his life anymore.

For example, Eb or Justin (I could see either doing so) instilling in him the fact that sex is bad. Maybe Eb heavily implied that sex not rooted in a long term loving relationship could be used for dark magic, or that it could be used as a way for someone to come after him - and Tommmy Tom and Jennifer's deaths would have certainly cemented that thought! Or perhaps Justin was saving him as something of a virgin sacrifice/temptation for demons (for some reason). Considering that Justin was trying to mind-magic Harry, it certainly wouldn't stray far that he could have instilled a fear of sex to cement that. Maybe it was even something that went WRONG, or maybe it was the one thrall attempt that actually worked.

It may have also been Elaine. Maybe something happened with that relationship and Harry got burned; or someone else from school/neighborhood/whatever had a relationship with Harry but was only using him - it may have even happened several times, as it's not exactly uncommon for teenagers to go through several relationships.

It's also possible that he believes Elaine was thralled and in a worse state than he was because of sexual/potentially sexual relationship he had with her.

There's just so much about Harry's past that we don't know - him having a fear of sex is a possibility, but it's also possible that the real fear is something that he's associating with sexual relationships that we don't see. He has so many potential reasons to be a chauvinistic bastard that it's hard to say.

Because he also spent a good deal of time with Eb, who is a bit old-fashioned. Chauvinistic bastard was probably a common and accepted attitude when he grew up, and he could have passed that on to Harry who, having just been saved from death by Eb, would be working very hard to stay on Eb's good side. Right after his trial Harry would have likely been very confused, grateful, and scared - he would likely have done very little to piss Eb off in those first few days, and that sort of traumatic event changes people. He may very well (subconsciously) be thinking that he still has to obey some of Eb's not-so-subtle orders given way-back-when, because if he pisses the man off to much than Eb will kill him. Not logical, no, especially considering a sexual relationship, but not psychologically impossible either.

(Anonymous) 2011-05-28 04:14 am (UTC)(link)
Uh, sorry about the rambling - comment was longer than I thought!

(Anonymous) 2012-03-02 02:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I suspect that part of it is imbibing a fair amount of social messages until he started killing radios. And one of those messages is that guys like sex, all sex, and that they can't be used.

Yeah, like him sheet dancing with his adopted sister is healthy. I suspect Justin knew and used that his own ends, encouraged it even (by restricting their ability to form friendships and other connections away from their little 'home').

Harry even young scrawny and not much of a runner is quite a physical presence by his 20s. It wouldn't be uncommon for him to think of assault mostly physically and less social engineered. One he believes himself 'proof against' and the other he's fighting an unarmed battle of wits.

So I could see him latching onto the most repressive aspects of social control of sex. That for him there is a very small area of 'safe' and the rest is just thicket waiting to rip people apart. These repressive aspects were the 'women's rules'.